Thursday, November 24, 2011
You know what's funny...Thanksgiving Edition
...that Peppermint Patty's voice sounds like a young black boy.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
You know what's funny...
exiting the breakroom with a handfull of old Halloween candy somebody put on the table but didn't expect anyone to actually eat that shit.
You know what's funny...
that Kreayshawwwn. And how after hearing her music, coming to respect that wigger. Also using the term "wigger".
You know what's funny...
Quoting a Jay-Z lyric on Facebook, then questioning if this is what you thought a 32 year old woman would do when you were 17. The answer is no.
Monday, May 16, 2011
You know what's funny...
...Hoarders and that new Extreme Couponing show. Laughing at peoples mass consuming and insane desire to collect items makes me feel whole again.
You know what's funny...
...witnessing your mom go through the trash at the Ben and Jerry's after your Dad 'accidentally' throws out a coupon supposedly for half off a cone. Then she finds it and it's for Baskin Robbins. And it's expired.
You know what's funny...
...thinking you have artistic integrity when you take Hipstamatic photos with your iphone.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
You know what's funny...
...saying "hi, how ya doin'" to a golden retriever inside Kinkos and having his owner go "you know he can't talk right?"
You know what's funny...
...sitting next to someone on the plane who is also afraid of flying then seeing her take several sleeping pills. Then 4 hours later when major turbulence hits and she's completely comatose, you have a split second visualization of rummaging through her bag to get those pills.
Friday, March 11, 2011
You know what's funny...
...when you wake up after an 11 hour nap to find Japan has been fucked by a Tsunami.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
You know what's funny...
...the coughing guy at work who sounds exactly like that homeless guy on the bus to downtown.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
You know what's funny...
...when parents let their baby crawl around on the dirty floor at Starbucks.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
You know what's funny...
...when you walk by a huge bulldog and then you realize it's cartoonishly throwing up into the street and it's really gross but you can't look away because you realize that the stuff it's throwing up is actually whole pieces of food.
You know what's funny...
...showing up to work with two distinctly different flip-flops on each foot and not noticing until the end of the day where you proceed to notify everyone of what you've done hoping for a good laugh but they all conclude you're just bat-shit crazy.
You know what's funny...
...when some asshole speeds by you on the street and you see him at the next stop light and you smugly turn to him as if to be "now where you racing to hotshot?" only to find that he does not give a shit.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
You know what's funny...
...sitting in the park eating lunch with friends and a pug when a woman wearing a visor and her not leashed french bulldog walk by and the owner screams "GIDGET! CIRCLES!" Thus setting in motion 5 seconds of utter chaos whereby Gidget runs circles around us and puts her ass in a sandwich, in said pugs face, in my soy mocha, then sprints off.
You know what's funny...
...when your parents lose their prescriptions sunglasses and cell phone 1 hour before you have to take them to the airport. Then your dad finds them in his pants pocket because apparently he has the worlds largest pants pocket even though he's only 5'6 and very stout.
You know what's funny...
...driving down the street with your parents from out of town and seeing the billboard that says "SEXUALLY RISKY BEHAVIOR? GET CHECKED FOR STD's" And then your Dad reads it out-loud and goes "there's something you wouldn't see in Colorado!" Then your mom says "what?" Then your dad repeats the whole thing again. Then your mom said "oh dear".
Saturday, February 19, 2011
You know what's funny...
...when your parents come into town and shoot down every suggestion you have for dinner, finally deciding to go to IHOP. And loving it.
You know what's funny...
...buying reduced sodium soup, then putting salt in it, thus over salting it, then throwing it away.
You know what's funny...
...coming home and seeing 5 snails all around the courtyard and realizing you've been drawing them wrong for years because they don't have eyes at all, only feelers. They also can't be picked up.
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